I'm a selfish person. I love my family, my partner and my friends but ultimately, I'm all about myself.
I like to spend the money that I earn, on my flat and presents for my loved-ones, but I'm very aware that what I want in life comes before anything else. I am also aware that this sounds terrible. Why does 'selfish' have such negative connotations? Why has it become such an insult?
The truth is it shouldn't be regarded as such a bad personality trait. Perhaps it's the only-child in me, or perhaps I just believe that selfishness is part of our basic human nature - survival skills. Although we have always hunted together and provided for our families, ultimately, we feed ourselves first.
I feel like this selfish trait is something that is particularly shunned when demonstrated in women. Men are congratulated for the same things that women are reprimanded for. For instance, when a man goes out every weekend, they are gently teased, "boys will be boys", but the negativity that women face does not mirror this.
The working mum is often represented in the media as being cold and heartless, while the traditional stay-at-home mum is portrayed as a gentle, warm woman (without make-up or apparently, a hairbrush) and these stereotypes are just not true. Its 2012, and many women are choosing to do many different things with their lives. Some – believe it or not – won’t even have children, which is, again, depicted as a self-centred flaw when it should be a choice.
A rather typical study that shows this was published in, of course, the Daily Mail, stating:
“More than half of females (55 per cent) admitted they choose the evening meal without taking their partner into consideration…. more than a third admit to regularly breaking a piece of chocolate in two and taking the larger piece.”
Oh, I am sorry! Should I also ask permission before brushing my teeth? I just don’t think these are relevant issues. Relationship issues, perhaps, if your partner is particularly pedantic, but no major cause for concern.
It’s difficult to juggle several tasks but women (and men) do it. Taking those extra minutes for you is crucial. Not just for beautifying, but I urge that everyone have some time to themselves. You might not have it all, but at least have something for yourself.
Long live independence, long live survival skills. Long live that slightly larger piece of chocolate!
Image via Ray_Delta_One Flickr Account